Many Men Have No Idea Of How To Please A Woman
Where Are They Going To Learn?
Maximum sexual pleasuring techniques, are learned skills? Only the very basics come naturally which are not always the most enjoyable. But when we have been taught that sex is so dirty that we must save it for marriage, and then only have one partner, how do we learn maximum pleasure sharing? Sexual pleasure sharing is learned just as walking and talking is learned, by experience and practice. Often we fear our sexuality based on society, religion or past unpleasant experiences. Therefore, we are often unable to experience and learn the full beauty of sexual pleasure sharing. When we think of sex, we usually only think of intercourse, but it involves much more.

Whole body sexuality can be even more loving and intimate with no concern about disease. Having our naked bodies caressed all over and warmly held with love and affection is as vital to our emotions as eating and drinking is to our health. For women, intercourse is often not the best way for maximum pleasure, but many men do not know how to give a woman maximum pleasure. Too many men want to manipulate a woman too much like a pinball machine. Tantra sex techniques which is based on women’s pleasure and sexual healing should be learned by men as well as such basics as G-spot stimulation and female ejaculation should be part of any High School sex education program. But since its about women's pleasure it is often ignored. Many women don’t even know of their own multifaceted potential for sexual pleasure.

I encourage sex workers to teach real intimacy skills instead the typical male idea of sex such as this woman describes:

Don't just zero in on the "Big Three" erotic zones and manipulate me like a pinball machine. Do play with my body and I will joyfully play with yours. We will become children again as we discover great joys, and we will be free and creative. Your will try things and we will find new areas of pleasure in both of our bodies.

Don't pretend that you're a vibrator at the head of my clitoris. Some women may like hard, but others prefer a light touch.

Don't be a jackhammer with your penis. Variation is more exciting until the end when a change of rhythm can be disconcerting when a climax is near.

When I am moist and you are hard enter with reverence, that first penetration. Feed me slowly and easily.

Don't be a fucker. Fuckers are boy scouts who think a fire is started by rubbing two genitals together at a fast pace. Fuckers think that they can "make me cum."   No one can "make me" cum.

Don't pull out without warning. Would you pull a chair out from under me?

Don't ask "Have you made it yet?" I'm not having sex just to make it. I am having sex with you to enjoy it. Orgasm, for both of us, may or may not come. It is silly to go on and on into exhaustion trying to make me cum. Sex should not be an obstacle race or an athletic event..

The time following sex is the most intimate time we can share with another human being. Don't just run off or fall asleep

Sex Workers Need to Also Be Human Not Just Mechanical
For example: The session was relieving but pretty mechanical. Brooke is not in the business of providing companionship -- she's in the business of jacking guys off. She was very energetic about it, but she needs to learn the secrets of rhythm, that faster does not necessarily make better, that slow and sensual is sometimes better. The session included some lap dancing, but she draped a washcloth (a little rough there, Brooke) on me before proceeding to grind away. She didn't object to me caressing and licking her breasts, but there was no reaction -- again, this was not a reciprocal experience for her.  And she needs to lose the Wrigley's Spearmint that was in her mouth the whole time and quit calling me "Sweetie."

Door fee was $30, and I opted for the $100 show. Overall evaluation: A decent, not superb, handjob from a very pretty lady who did a professional job of getting me off but who wasn't interested in enriching the experience with even a smidgen of small talk.

When We Share Sexually, We Grow
We do not "give ourselves away" by sharing sexually. When we share knowledge, we each gain more. The knowledge we share is not reduced but expanded through reaction and sharing with others. Likewise in sexual sharing we don't lose it, we share it and grow. If at some point an exclusive relationship is desired, sexual pleasure in that relationship will be enhanced by previous experimentation and experiences with a selective but wider range of trusted intimate friends.

Sex workers could be a vital source of healing by teaching and letting people experience different sexual and intimacy skills with a variety of people. Later the wife might appreciate the help of the sex worker that helped teach him good intimacy skills. In California sex surrogates provide healing but usually only where there is severe sexual dysfunction. Non dysfunctional people also need to learn intimacy skills and enjoy sex.

Monogamy Is Not Natural
A study of sexuality throughout human history shows it is very difficult to find societies that were monogamous. The natural order seems to be the desire for sexual variety in humans just like in most other primates. Today we live in very unusual times where in much of the Western world, monogamy is forced by religious beliefs. Christianity in particular has falsely translated scriptures and embraced a sex-negative view, which is totally unjustified by true biblical Christianity.

The View of A Sex Worker
One sex worker said "I don't think there’s anything inherently wrong with sex work. The problem with being a sex worker is that we live in a sex-negative, misogynist society. If we all thought sex was an important and vital need - as vital as food, which people pay for all the time - the people who perform sex for money, who provide that service, would be valued. It’s that simple. In my utopian vision of the world, sex work wouldn't disappear, it would increase. People wouldn't be ashamed to say they have sexual needs. They would be able to get sex when they needed it, to pay for it. And the people who provided that service would be valued."

Pay A Fair Price For Good Touch - Like Good Food
Sharing good sexuality for its medical as well as emotional benefits is just as important as attractive food. Just like you go to a good restaurant, and pay a fair price for beautifully prepared food, you should be willing to support sex workers by paying a fair price to have important sensual touch needs met by an attractive woman. This is a legitimate need, especially for single men or whose wives are not providing enough good touch.

Variety Is the Spice of Life ...And Sex
Just because a concert hall exists doesn't mean people aren't going to want to listen to the stereo. People are going to want the same essential thing in different formats. Just because you have really great sex with your partner, doesn't mean you don't enjoy other variety. Ideally there wound be more services and the people who provide those services would be supported and valued as they are in other societies. Not that there aren't people now who value sex workers, but very few are willing to express this in public due to society’s negative sexual views and silly sex laws based on our sexual immaturity. As it is now sex workers are simultaneously prized and reviled for what they provide. Some very much see themselves as healers. But when the rest of the world views you as trash, it's hard to stand up and declare "But look, I'm a healer." So the stigma is often the most difficult thing to deal with.

A Reader's Reaction From Europe
Well, I'm here in Amsterdam and have been reading this thread on legal prostitution. Frankly, I have been a little surprised at the level of discussion.

Prostitution is legal in most countries, including all the European community countries. It is licensed, regulated, etc. I think its a good thing. Whether it has lead to a reduction in crimes against women or not, I think would be hard to prove. More interesting to me, at least, is how the ease of sexual out-letting changes the dynamics in man/woman relationships...and it is reasonably safe as crossing the street

For $400 you can fly to London, Paris, Amsterdam, Berlin, or Hamburg and have all the professional sex you want. Yet I don't see many of the people talking about it doing it.

Latin Culture’s More Mature View
Latin's hold their mothers in high respect. Many have long three part names that includes both mother and father’s last name as they carry mothers' name out of love and respect. Although much of Latin America is devout Catholic, prostitution allows Latin’s to remain respectful of female relatives (would never "hit" on them sexually), but allows men to express their sexuality without the hang-ups of Americans. Prostitutes are the steam valves in the society. For example, in Mexico prostitution while not actually legal, a woman practicing the noble profession of pleasing men must be registered. She obtains a heath certificate and must be checked for diseases once a month. She is only arrested if she does not register. Most Mexicans respect prostitutes as professionals. They serve a worthwhile purpose. If only the U.S. were as mature.

In Jewish Israel Prostitution Not Illegal
And Not An Issue For Biblical Christians
Tel Aviv is known for its prostitutes. Any beachside hotel will be packed with gorgeous ladies. The city has over 150 brothels, mostly stocked with Russian women as well as natives. This is also more in line with biblical values as Hebrews and early Christians could have as many wives and concubines (breeders) as they could afford. Nowhere in the original biblical texts is there anything wrong with these relationships. Only traditional twisting of the original Greek/Hebrew texts by translators in the Middle Ages have resulted in our repressive Christian values. We specialize in helping Christians understand the reasons and facts about biblical Christian sexual issues and have over 2000 subscribers worldwide to our newsletter.

In Denmark Disabled Provided Sex
In Denmark, Danes have decided that citizens who are disabled need sex too, and should have equal access to prostitutes. To that end, some cities have arranged for social workers to escort disabled people to prostitutes for 30-minute visits. A city official explained that sexual help to a physically or mentally handicapped person offers him or her a much higher quality of life and helps uplift spirits.

Mental patients get cut-rate prostitutes in Amseterdam
Once a month male patients from a Dutch psychiatric hospital pile into a minibus and head for the Club d'Amour in Maastricht's red-light district for half an hour of cut-price sex with prostitutes. The visits are arranged by Cecile aan de Stegge, chairwoman of the Netherlands Association of Psychiatric Nursing, for patients of the Vijverdal psychiatric hospital, near Maastricht. She's concerned that the sexual rights of patients are being neglected. "Some patients wanted sex and were going to brothels and being badly treated. "I felt that if patients were going to have sex and they wanted to see a prostitute, then this need should be respected and they should do it in a clean and safe place.''

United States vs. Europe View of Supporter
I wish you the best of luck with repealing the "Sex Industry" laws.

As the "Land of the Free" it is rather odd that we have some of the most repressive laws on personal freedoms and 'victimless crimes'.

I just got back from Europe. The locals view us as very uptight, and immature (sexually, and in regards to cigarettes and alcohol). Heck in most places your can buy a cigarette or a beer at 15 or visit a prostitute at 16. All legal. Here we like to pretend we are above that, while it all goes on underground in a unsafe fashion.

Please note that in most areas of Europe you can't get a driver's license until your 18. The logic is better than ours. By the time you can drive, you've gotten over the drinking that most people do when the are suddenly legal. Cigarettes they just don't see a problem with.

And prostitution is an accepted alternative to affairs. You don't find topless clubs there though. I guess if you don't want sex, it just cost less.

It seems that the older I get the more stupid our country seems to me. We spend so much time on victimless crime (smoking, drinking, sex, speeding, seatbelts, suicide) that we can't keep the violence down. I have been in combat zones that were safer than some areas of the USA. Sad.

In The U.S. Sex Work Can Make You Lonely and Isolated
Unless you have a strong supportive relationship, as you get exposed to a lot of loneliness, you can soak that up and it can be very painful. You're also very isolated. If you're a sex worker, you don't get to come home and complain about your work. The fundamental concept of sex work in this society is that it’s wrong, so people don't want to hear how hard it is. They'll just say, "So why do you do it?" Of course you do it because you've got to work like anybody else, but that doesn't wash with people. There’s this whole insidious judgment that keeps sex workers very isolated.

Sex Workers Have To Put Up With Lots Of Garbage from Clients
For example as one reviewer said: As most of you who have followed the reviews of Chelsea since October know, she is very new to this profession, and has not had much experience running a business in the past. It seems the poor girl is being baptized by fire. She initially charged too little which resulted in more business than she could handle, she got busted once, was robbed by a client, who later returned a few days later and tried to rob her a second time and he beat her because she had no money on her. She has had to move her operation every week because she is being stalked. And on top of that, people are calling setting up appointments and not showing (sound familiar?).

As a result of these experiences, she is getting more street wise. She is implementing some things to make getting in touch with her easier (better email set up, and she is going to verify appointments by calling back a client to ensure you really ordered the pizza).

The Positive Side to Sex Workers
One woman said "It has given me a view of the society’s relationship to sexuality, where the rubber meets the road, that I couldn't have gotten anywhere else. I get to be inside this huge lab, observing and participating in my own way in human behavior. It’s given me absolutely invaluable insights into the human condition that I couldn't otherwise get. As time has gone by, it’s also given me the ability to empathize with human frailty, to understand that we're all imperfect people in an imperfect world. And it’s served me well financially".

Learning to be intimate is desired by some men:
Another letter to Liberated Christians says:
Thanks for your prompt reply & your advise. This morning, I spent reading your articles I got off the net about "Have we forgotten how to make love", the Human Awarness Institute, & Esalen massage. I think my real problem is the barriers traditional Christianity & the World has created. I have no idea how to be intimate without going overboard. By what I mean is that there is nothing in my experience of how to be close, to be intimate without the sex.